A Peek Inside a Beginner's Mind

Last Friday, I jumped at the chance to join the group AgosKulay in an ArtJam. The group was formed in the early '90s and is currently headed by Mr. Jonas Salvosa. I also met Mr. Paul Yap who has been painting since the '70s. Since their younger days, they've established and been part of pockets of communities that would come together to hone their craft and make art. Up until now, they carry the same spirit that lead them to create and to keep on creating. They've shared much of their energy in keeping the art wheels turning in their own unique way. Even if it is as simple as taking the time to talk to a beginner like me. 

Paul says: 

1. "Remember to look at form, contour and placement"

2. "When you look outside- there's just not one kind of green.  Look at layers of color. There's green that has blue in it, or green that has yellow in it. It moves from light to dark or dark to light." 

Conquering the blank page was the most challenging thing to overcome publicly. People were watching us capture what we see. I was so overwhelmed by the experience that starting was such a blur. My untamed mind kept rambling- "How do I do this? What do I do now? Why did I even get myself into this? BlahBlahBlah..."  It was so disorienting that I had to shush myself to start. 

Jonas says: 

1. "Just start. Don't be afraid to make a mark."

2. "Start with simple lines and learn tonal value. Look at depth."

3. "There's talent but you need to develop technique."

A big part of looking is to see it for what it is, and to be able to do that I had to learn how to listen to what it was showing me. What did I see? My own limitation. I knew I had a long way to go... 10,000 hours away to build technique. Experiencing this was one of the most humbling and liberating feelings. I guess this is what it means to let go of one's ego. What a good way to start. Now the question is, how can I turn this into a habit? 

For Real, It's a Deal!

I decided to make this little project of mine permanent. Unraveling thoughts and letting ideas evolve has become such an interesting experience for me. It has freed me from the clutter in my mind. I stopped imagining things for what they could be and just got my hands dirty doing it. You know what they say once you start, you can't stop. 

My whole life I've been winging it exploring my flight's of fancy. It's been fun, but I know it's time to take the things I fancy seriously. There's something scary about making things permanent, I guess it's the thought of never really knowing if you're making the right choice or it could be un-choosing other choices. The stakes are high when you're investing in chance but there's always magic that comes with the risk and it's the ability to hope. 

Hope you stay HocusFocused! :)

Now What's Next?

What comes after starting?  Monday, the day that symbolizes new beginnings. This challenge is making me realize how a Eureka moment can easily fizzle out when the chores of Monday come.  Monotony seems to be my enemy. Challenges come on repeat. Change knocks on our doors everyday. Hearing my friend's encouragements over the weekend made me think that the real challenge of starting is continuing. 

A challenge is a challenge. I accepted this challenge in hope to find a different side of myself. Someone that I can grow into. Isn't that what art is all about, enjoying the process of discovery? So for the next 30 days, I'm on a mission to make meaning out of fragments of inspiration and ideas in hope that it will continue to lead me to my true north. 

I need to keep an eye on my "I". This morning I came across a line from a book I was reading  and it said "For the beginner, there are many possibilities, for the expert, there are very few." This keeps me hopeful. I just have to keep exploring the beginning of a new beginning.

So here's to rising up to the mundane and conquering Monday. Cheers!

This Is Not Me 30 Day Challenge

A good friend of mine, Maui sent me a TED video of Matt Cutts who challenges us to think about- "What sustainable thing will you try to do for 30 days?" It made me wonder of what would challenge me to expand myself creatively. For the past couple of weeks I've been feeling stuck and my morale was on a downswing. I feel like I never finish something and get easily disappointed with my lack of discipline. trying to be an independent freelancer is not as easy as I thought it would be. To manage and make is a challenge on it's own. I know that I have to develop so much of what I lack if I want to really pursue a well-balanced life as a freelance artist. I know how to make- but to manage- AHCK! That's my achilles heel. So for 30 days, I challenge myself to become the opposite of who I think I am.  So far I have come up with  3 Counter Intuitive Steps for my This Is Not Me Challenge.

  

1. Choose one thing to finish, just one. Not all. Rome wasn't built in 30 days. 

I have a short attention span, and I get very impatient with myself. I come up with too many ideas/ projects and the list can go on and on. This is why I can't seem to finish something because I get lost in my thoughts. I hope by curating my ideas and calming my everyday thoughts enable me to create in a meticulous and disciplined way. Is this me? No. But I will try.  

2. Make god laugh by making a plan. 

I'm not a fan of planning. I've always been a freestyler, or a free-spirit. Right now though, I've been feeling the need to change some of my merry ways. If I want my ideas to come to life, I need to start moving by letting go of all my anxiety with solving problems. Through planning, I hope to be able to manage my time and energy better. That would be such a gift. Is this me? No. But I will try. 

3. Be ready to let go of control and just go with the flow.
I promise to let go off my attachment to outcome. All I need to do is to keep on going. This seems to be such a liberating step. To be able to be and to do in many, many ways.

Starting this challenge is making me so nervous and excited to find out what I can finish. :) 

How about you, what's your 30 Day Challenge?